therapy

went through an exercise (worksheet) on separating out situation, moods, thoughts, hotness of each thought, evidence support and not supporting, alternate/balanced thoughts, modified mood

good way to break it down when you get upset

i do usually after getting the change to vent at someone feel better and view a situation differently but it's hard when i work at home and have no one to vent to to work it through harder to do with myself (for me)

 5.6 burnout

'Get in the Van' and Other Tips for Getting Meaningful Customer Feedback https://review.firstround.com/the-power-of-interviewing-customers-the-right-way-from-twitters-ex-vp-product
 
Key Take aways

1. talk to customers (they say every day)

2. do at least 30 interviews to validate a solution

-5 Minutes: Introductions.

-30 Minutes: We think you have this problem.

-Do you have this problem?

-How are you solving this problem today?

-How much are you spending to solve this problem? (If your product isn’t paid, ask them how much they care about the problem.)

-How does this problem impact your business?

-10 Minutes: Here’s how we’re thinking of solving the problem.

-10 Minutes: Feedback and next steps.

 3. Consider doing the "how would you invest 100$" question

4. write notes/score immediately after. questions proposed

-How sophisticated was the business you met with?

-How technically sophisticated were they?

-What were the top three problems that the customer identified for you to solve?

-Would they beta test with you?

-What would they pay?

-Did they identify other people for you to meet with?

-Any surprises?

 

I thought it aligned with a lot of things i have learned in classes and other places but in a nice succinct way!

"We are in love with our solutions. We’re in love with our products. But that’s missing the point."

 https://anchor.fm/take-regular-breaks/episodes/Episode-6-The-importance-and-value-of-writing-with-Dennis-Relojo-Howell-eniidf

Take Regular Breaks is the positive mental health podcast empowering you to find balance in all aspects of your life. Host Tania Diggory, Founder of Calmer, talks to a range of inspiring and influential thought leaders, authors and creative entrepreneurs. Discussions include conversations about nurturing a mentally healthy work culture, balancing success and mental health, going beyond resilience, and how we can all do our part to contribute to a kinder, more sustainable world.

For more information: www.thisiscalmer.com/podcast

Follow us on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook: @thisiscalmer

 https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/how-be-yourself/201611/how-recover-job-stress-and-burnout

Tip #1: Start with your body. This might sound cliché, but take care of yourself.  

Tip #2: Pinpoint the root of your problems. Decades of research have boiled work problems down to six things:

Heavy workload: You feel like you’re drowning, unable to catch up. Work keeps coming at you like that I Love Lucy episode with the chocolates on the conveyor belt.

Lack of control: You feel you have no agency or choice in your duties, process, or deadlines.

Insufficient Reward: You feel exploited. You think you’re not being appropriately rewarded for all that you do in terms of finances, prestige, or positive feedback.

Unfairness: You feel that your work environment is hostile or unjust.

Lack of Community: There’s a surplus of backstabbing and mean-spiritedness among your co-workers, plus a deficit of support and camaraderie.

Working in Opposition to Your Values: You work against your conscience or morals, like evicting old ladies or harpooning baby whales.

Once you know exactly what’s snuffing your fire, try Tip #3: Imagine the best version of the future. The opposite of job burnout is job engagement. Imagine what it would take for you to be engaged. Where would you like to be? What are the things a great workplace should have? How can you take control of your work and make your own choices rather than have them made for you?

Tip #4: Aim for a better match. 

Tip #5: If you’ve done all you can with your current job, make some big decisions. Think like a boss. Make some executive decisions. If making a better match fails, that might be your cue to start looking for another job or to go back to school.   

Tip #6: Shift your expectations. So make some internal changes as well: shift from saving the world to helping those who will let you. Or aim for improvement, not perfection.

Tip #7: Delegate. Hear me out on this one. By “delegate” I don’t mean dump the part of your job you don’t like on the intern. Instead, fight the feeling that you’re the only one who can handle things.  

 

Tip #8: Diversify your time.  

Tip #9: Take all your vacation days. 

 Overall through my online coaching, therapy, reading, the following themes reoccur

• physical activity
• sun
• mindfulness (meditation, grounding, body scan etc) tried headspace, been using calm as i have it for free this year - at least doing something very in the moment even if it's eating and cooking (the smell, the feel, the taste the sight)
• gratitude journal - or positive thing journal
• rest time
• enough sleep
• lavendar
• notice stress and journal it down parking lot for later
• try not to overbook calendar, get more realistic about timelines
• take set breaks, like lunch, away from work
• boundaries, work and home

Burn down Historical Points

• 2009-2011

  • 2009 job gets stressful (24/7 support and they aren’t hiring help)

  • 2011 quit without job lined up

    • Take first and only offer post unemployment, move to Texas leaving behind friend family etc starting from scratch

• 2012

  • Don't like (new) boss 

  • too hot

  • too far from family

  • Look for job, any job

    • Take first offer, move to Virginia, again leave everything and everyone behind and start over

• 2017

  • Work stressful post VCs takeover

  • Health poor (migraines and trouble sleeping) - resolves once i quit

  • mom declares tea business dead

  • Had planned to wait until July and follow S.O. because tired of small town

  • Decide to take first and only job offer   

  • Forces issues with S.O., breakup

  • Stress forces issues with second S.O. and we break up 

• 2018
  I wanted to spend 12 months at job

• it's not bad, it's not great

• work is interesting

• coworkers are ok

• puzzles to solve, things to organize, pay is good

• some things i dislike and people say won't improve (but i have not yet pushed the issue, too new)-like the rigid hours, dress code, and NO work flexibility or remote work (they weren't)

• wasn't getting to enjoy area b/c visiting parents a lot and long commute
  
  

Actionables
steps to fighting burnout

https://burnout.io/en/latest/actionables.html

 

How Google's Marissa Mayer Prevents Burnout

https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/223723

Oct 2019
partner decided i was burnt out, i didn't think i was
i went to coaching
tried to learn:
-to set boundiaries
-set more realistic schedules
-set time aside to play
-go outside daily, and walk
-do nightly tai chi
-screenless lunches

Sadly didn't take good notes during :(

Read:
- https://markmanson.net/fuck-yes
- Drop the Ball https://libro.fm/audiobooks/9781427282569-drop-the-ball
- Burnout https://libro.fm/audiobooks/9781984845917-burnout
- The Art of Asking: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Let People Help By: Amanda Palmer, Brené Brown - foreword
July 2020

I hit 5.1 on the burnout index by July 6, 2020

Dec 19 - Jan 10

I decided to take 3 weeks vacation to see if it helped

I worked a little on a project for IoD

https://internetofdon.gs/considering-becoming-an-adult-model-or-performer/

I didn't get as far as i hoped

I slept a bunch

I was dealing with my bun being sick (infected eye) he still sort of is :(

I played a bunch of animal crossing, i hadn't played since defcon really so lots of catchup

I had time to read a book

I made progress on my inbox 0 project for my dozen or so inboxes

got my books sorted

got back into tea blogging, but that didn't last much past vacation

In January I also signed up for "new year's explorations" with Dr Liz Powell

https://drlizpowell.com/product/new-years-explorations/

https://amazonv.dreamwidth.org/tag/new+year%27s+explorations

April 2021
I got to 5.5/6 April 5, 2021