Nicky's Journal

I forget i have a disability frequently
I've always lived this way

But sometimes things happen and i'm reminded and I realize I am at a disadvantage.

I was at Disneyland, in indoor lines, and I couldn't see

the lighting was dim / ambient

I could NOT see - i was gripping the handrails worried the path would turn, or i would bump into people

it was frustrating and disorienting

because i worried i could get hurt

but also because i know they well decorate these areas for atmosphere and I was missing out on that

I ended up having to use my partner, Zach, as a seeing eye guide

https://www.dhs.wisconsin.gov/blind/adjustment/dos-donts.htm#:~:text=DO%20allow%20the%20person%20you,of%20a%20flight%20of%20stairs.

I didn't realize it wasn't the same for everyone until I asked him finally toward day end "can you see" and he said yes and i was like "really? like you can see the people and walkway?" and he was like "yeah it's dim but i can see everything"

I am grateful he was there 

but it reminds me when my other partner jokes how bright the house is since i moved in (i made him add many lights) it's because otherwise the place is very very dark to me, yet he is light sensitive

i don't like being reminded and am privileged I can often forget (and mostly other just suffer when they borrow my sighted guns)